Scared to Socialize – UPDATE

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One of the bi-products of this last eighteen months of perpetual isolation and encouraged division has been my reluctance to make new friends.

I’m not an introvert, but this season has definitely made me think twice before venturing out to make new friends.

My husband and I have always been involved in church. But with the churches closing their doors, and home teams and Bible study groups breaking apart because of fear and restrictions, we’ve been reluctant to jump back in there. Truth? We got lazy.

For one thing, I feel like I am alone in my viewpoints of this whole plandemic. I feel like the only ones who share my views are a handful of friends (if that) and many of my blogging friends. I swear my whole town has lost their freaking minds. The division, even among my Christian friends, is palpable. I haven’t seen two friends that I used to have lunch with every week in months! I thought our friendship meant more than an injection could tear apart. We aren’t enemies, mind you, I just never hear from them…ever. And it hurts.

Our weekly Bible study group has decided to start meeting again, but over this last year, it’s become clear that our beliefs are very different. Not to mention, the last few times we met, the discussion was more about the plandemic and less and less about the Bible. So, we are looking for a new group.

I reached out to a new group forming with a different church, and they emailed back to me. But here’s where I’m at…I’m terrified to put myself out there again. This town has a bad habit of being very guarded. Even my kids feel it. You can know people for eight years and know nothing about them. And they have no problem walking away. I swear I’m still closer, and feel less judged, by my friends from California than I do here. And I haven’t seen them, other than online, in nine years or more!

And then we have to go through mask or no mask, vaccinated or unvaccinated, etc. So annoying! Is it just me? I mean, how do I approach this? Personally, I don’t care if others are vaccinated or masked or not. I still believe in medical freedom. But do I have to reveal MY personal medical information just to be there? Truly, what’s the decorum on this? We are in unchartered waters here.

Any advice?

Thank you for the encouraging words. I can always count on you guys and ladies. So, I made the phone call and spoke with the new group leader today. She and her husband lead the Bible Study. She seemed nice, and our first meeting is September 14 (masks optional).  Praying it works out.

9 comments

  1. Lisa, have you called the two friends you haven’t heard from in months? Maybe they’re waiting for YOU to call THEM. Sometimes and in some of my relationships it feels like I’m always the one who reaches out, but once I do, the friends seem very happy to get together. As annoying as it is to always be the initiator, sometimes that’s just the way it is, and you need to decide if the friendships are worth the trouble. For me, some of them are, some not so much.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. @Lisa V

    Never have been much on the social scene, but I do find I have less opportunity to meet with people than I use to.

    I find it frustrating that even relatives pressure me to wear a mask. When the idiot booster shot becomes available, I suppose government busybodies and relatives will be making a stink about that too.

    I think all this social distancing has accomplished is favor the development of more contagious viruses. We have the Delta Variant because nothing else could spread. Big accomplishment!

    So, how should we react? Well, we don’t want to put our friends and relatives in an awkward moral position. We don’t want them to believe that they have to violate their own consciences in order to see us. Romans 14 talks about this sort of thing. So does 1 Corinthians 8. At the same time, we don’t want to violate our own consciences. So, I don’t have any problem wearing a mask. I think it is dumb, but others are convinced it works. Still, I am not going to pressure anyone to wear a mask, and I will protest against government officials who force school children to wear the stupid things.

    The vaccine? If you were getting up in years, then the danger of getting seriously ill from the virus probably justifies getting at least one vaccination. Otherwise, the vaccinations are about as much trouble as they are worth.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I think what you’ve experienced has happened to friends, churches, all over the country to some degree. We were only online for six months and people still walked away. We’ve been meeting in person since February and still not where we were. It’s amazing how supposed Jesus-loving people responded in such fear over all of this.

    My only advice is to do whatever you can to make relationships, new ones if you have to, and find a church family who isn’t hiding in fear. It may take a while, but it’s for yours and your family’s well-being. We weren’t meant to be isolated.

    In the meantime (and even after), we can encourage one another on the blogosphere. And maybe Tom can get us all a special place together in the internment camp when the time comes. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. It sounds like the friends you mentioned weren’t truly your friends, I’m sorry that they’re excluding you because of your medical choices. Vaccinated people can get and spread covid so none of the forced mandates makes any sense to me. I hope you find a new church, it’s awful what this situation has done to churches while allowing strip shows and sex clubs to remain open. Something’s seriously wrong with our world right now.

    Liked by 1 person

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