Help! I’m becoming a helicopter mom!

 

I thought I was a “chill” mom, but I guess I’m not.

I’ve never really been a helicopter mom. When the kids both started pre-school, and the other moms were crying on that first day, and children were clinging to their mother’s legs, mine left me willingly. It was almost insulting…they couldn’t wait to get away from me! LOL

But I considered it a blessing. We’ve never experienced separation anxiety, except for one brief week in kindergarten for my son. I’m not sure what got into him, but it left as quickly as it arrived.

Now that they’re in their pre-teen and teen years, however, I find myself wanting to hold on to them tighter.

Maybe it’s because I know what I did as a teen and what my husband got away with, and that scares me to death. And, by the way, I was the “good kid” in my group.

My daughter is 15…she’ll be driving in a year, God willing. And there are some days that I’m surprised she remembers to put on shoes before she leaves for school. How will she be ready to operate a motor vehicle! We better do a lot of work this next year.

This weekend, she got an offer to got to her first concert with a friend in the big city. It was a dive club that they’d have to take the metro to. Her friend’s mother was going to accompany them, so I shouldn’t have been nervous, but I was. My husband wasn’t. He was all-encouraging and pointed out that we were driving ourselves to concerts in horrible parts of Hollywood unaccompanied, when we were 16. But I was the third and last child in the birth order at my house and figured that my parents had given up being strict by the time I rolled around. Besides, I was the “good” kid, remember?

My kids are “good” kids too. Really good. But the world has gotten a lot scarier than when we were teens…or at least it appears that way. Maybe my eyes are just more opened to what’s out there compared to what my parents knew what was going on. Thanks information age. #notemysarcasm

So, what’s happening to me? Why am I feeling the need to hold on tighter when I should be loosening my grip? I know it’s wrong and I’m not doing them any favors. They need to explore and make mistakes. It’s just that the older they get, the bigger the mistakes get, and there’s no way to make them understand that.

The concert thing worked itself out. Turns out the club they wanted to go to has an 18 and over age limit. At least I escaped this time. But more times will come, and I’m just going to have to trust that I’ve prepared them, and learn to clip my helicopter wings a little…but not completely. And maybe watching the news a little less would help too.

How about you? Do you find yourself letting go or holding on tighter as your kids get older?

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8 thoughts on “Help! I’m becoming a helicopter mom!

  1. Honestly a little of both! I am pushing them to do things on their own for school, ask you teacher about this grade, ask you tutor….. But, with social stuff I tend to want to delay some of the things. My daughter went to her first concert this year, she 16, at a local college. She hated it but she has that experience.

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  2. Mine are still very young, but I think I can understand your feelings on this. I remember doing crazy stuff, and I was also the “good”child. My husband was a wild child from the start, and both of my kids got a healthy dose of that genetic crazy lol.

    And yes, the information age surely doesn’t do anything to ease the mind. YouTube videos of children being snatched right from under the mom’s wing? What the helicopter!? (<Lame joke attempt!)

    I personally feel I could have used a little more intervention and supervision as a teen. It sucks having all the horrors of the world show up all over our media these days, but it also gives us the benefit of knowing what's out there… Something I feel my parents never fully grasped in the beginning of the mass interweb days. I think I'll trust my kids as teens, but I don't trust the evils of the world, and I'll do what I can to protect their safety and innocence until they're fully capable of doing it on their own.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ABSOLUTELY !! I feel the same way ..the world does seem scarier , or maybe all the scary stuff is just talked about more so we are more aware . Or im more aware because im the parent now. But your right bigger kids , bigger mistakes . That could potentialy be life altering .my boys are 13 and 16 . They go all over the place witg there friends , park , mall ,beach .. they are pretty good at calling and letting me know their ok . Where as i am glad their not little any more and are self sufficiant , sometimes im just not ready for them to be grown up either lol

    Liked by 1 person

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